Showing posts with label squash. Show all posts
Showing posts with label squash. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Does this blog post anger you? Please, let's just SQUASH the drama...

I just returned from a weekend up in the Poconos (like way up there: Lake Ariel-area, to be exact). I've been spoiled on three whole days of Rusty's cooking. Here's a little sneak peek of what my weekend entailed:










And for some reason, Rusty's a fan of my blog--crazy, right? I mean, have you seen the shit I put on here?
PS: And yes, I enlightened Rusty on the definition of the Rusty Trombone. Good times.


Anyway, now that I've got your attention (and hunger), I can proceed with being a total dick.

The above photos have absolutely NOTHING to do with this blog post or it's featured recipe.

Why in fact...


...it's another SQUASH post!!!

Recognize the sexy acorn above? Well you should, because it's the same survivor from the "Stop, Drop & Roll..Squash" video featured in last week's post. And yes, the dent on the bottom is from colliding with my camera lens.

Well, anyway, Sexy Acorn was sitting up in the ICU (AKA a ceramic bowl on my pathetic wooden square of counter space) for about a week, resting up for his big day (and so I could once again taunt your starving souls with yet another squash post).

He even made a friend while in recovery:

(Taken with my phone camera, so excuse the photo quality)

Awwwww. How precious...

...until I baked his ass.


Roll THIS, Bitches!




Baked Acorn Squash with Honey and Brown Sugar*
*Again, borrowed from my squash BIBLE, whatscookingamerica.net/squash.htm

Makes 2 servings

Ingredients
-1 acorn squash, halved
-2 tbsp butter
-2 tbsp honey
-2 tsp dark brown sugar
-Salt & pepper, to taste

Steps
-Cut squash in half lengthwise, and remove seeds and pulp. Reserve seeds if you're a conservationist (or poor) and would like a toasted snack.
-Place squash halves, cut sides up, in a glass baking dish. Add about 1/4 inch of water to the dish, and scrape the squash's insides with a fork (don't worry, he's a masochist).
-Fill squash halves with equal portions butter, honey, and brown sugar. Sprinkle with a dash of salt and pepper.


-Bake at 375° for at least 1 hour. After an hour, check with a fork to see if your squash is done. It should slide easily into the flesh (again, no worries--he likes it). If it's, er, "resisting," throw that baby back into the oven for another 15, 20 minutes. I reached succulent, baked perfection after 1 hour and 20 minutes.


-Remove squash from oven, plate, and serve.


Pardon the fork indent. I was checking Sexy Acorn's doneness and got a little carried away.



If you are still upset over my above teaser photos (GTFOverIt), here's some good news. I actually cooked the meal in the last photo, with the orzo, tomato salad, and chicken cutlet. Check out the Mediterranean-style Orzo recipe here.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Squash: The Sequel

This title should immediately conjure up some memories. But just in case you don't stalk my life (shoutout to Pauly D) and remember my every last post, here is a refresher course:



Vintage squash post circa July 2009:
Butternut Squash Risotto / My precious "Kabocha" getting (almost) run over by a Nissan Murano

And this one, for good measure:
Butternut Squash & Red Potato Soup + A peek at my sexy 49¢ placemats



Yes, September brings the birth of both football season and Oktoberfest (and yes, it begins in September, not October...silly Germans). But fall is also the season of SQUASH! This excites me to an extremely inappropriate degree (probably because I've been consistently drunk throughout the entire season).

Nothing brings me more pleasure than a man returning home from a long day of work and a grueling gym workout, expecting a hearty meal of steak and roasted potatoes, only to find this:


REAL MEN EAT ACORN SQUASH.

Or throw bitchfits, as my loving boyfriend did in the video below:




Delicata squash* doesn't roll as well (more of a phallic shape...double revenge), so it beat out the acorn squash for dinner that evening.

*Recipe stolen from http://whatscookingamerica.net/squash.htm. Perfect beginner's site, for those who want to become obsessed with squash.





Delicata Squash with Chili-Lime Butter

Makes 2 Servings

Ingredients
-2 delicata squashes (see photo below)
-1/2 stick of butter, softened
-1 lime, juiced
-A dash or 2 of chili powder
-Salt & pepper, to taste

Steps
-Half delicata squash and remove seeds/fibers.


-Place face-down in a glass baking dish. Add about 1/4 inch of water to the dish.


-Bake at 350° for 30 minutes.
-Meanwhile, combine butter, lime juice, chili powder, and salt & pepper in a small bowl. Set aside.
-Remove squash from oven, and fill it's insides with the chili-lime butter (sounds kinky...and also sounds like a clogged artery. Yum!).

Delicata squash is a summer squash, like zucchini. So you can eat the skin.


REAL MEN EAT DELICATA.



PS: And because I'm a broke bitch, I waste nothing. You can reserve the seeds (wash off the fibers) and toast them as you would pumpkin seeds.


Once again, because I'm too drunk/lazy, check out this page (scroll down to the bottom) for seed ideas: http://whatscookingamerica.net/squash.htm

Sunday, November 29, 2009

My Big Fat Italian Thanksgiving...

Being a holiday week and all, I thought I'd switch things up a bit. As the official Tailgate Blogger for Buffalo Sports Daily, I've been supplying you loyal readers tailgate recipes ever since the start of football season. However, any tailgating food I whip up this Sunday will most likely be some concoction of Thanksgiving leftovers and scraps. So it's only right to show you guys the origins of those leftovers and scraps, right?

Here's a little peek at Thanksgiving, done the fat I-talian way. To me, it's one of those days where I always make sure I have a festive pair of stretch pants on hand. Although this year, I'm not sure stretch pants did the trick. I needed a stretch stomach.

He knows what I'm talking about.





Now, some of these photos are just teases. I'm not writing out 20 recipes. One, I don't feel like it. And two...well, some of them I don't know offhand.

I'm lucky I got any photos at all...people kept reaching for food as I was trying to get my 'Photographer' on. Rude.

Because I'm exhausted (turkey hangover), I kept the recipes short and simple. I know they're usually a bit more detailed, but let's be honest--50% of those details are dirty jokes and sexual innuendos that have nothing to do with anything.





Before we down the traditional Thanksgiving spread, we pregame. With this:





Before dinner, I served up some Butternut Squash & Potato Soup. It was done in about 5 seconds. R. I. P., you sexy squash. I regret not being able to photograph you before your depletion.
But we can always relive your glory days via this post from 8/3/09:

http://theunemployedchef.blogspot.com/2009/08/butternut-squash-soup.html

Oh yea, the above link also contains the soup's recipe. Check it out.
(I used Baby Dutch Yellow Potatoes instead of the Baby Reds, and doubled the recipe.)



From left: Stuffing with Sausage, Bacon, and Mushrooms; Stuffing with Apple, Cranberry, and Walnuts; Candied Yams with Marshmallows

I had to stick with the past 2 weeks' sausage-fest theme (If you're a new reader or have no idea what I'm referring to, click here and here.

Stuffing with Sausage, Bacon, and Mushrooms

-16-ounce bag seasoned cornbread stuffing of your choice, moisted with chicken stock instead of water (To avoid overpowering the remaining ingredients, use less stuffing. 10-12 ounces should be enough.)
-Onions and celery, sautéed in butter and olive oil
-16-ounce Italian sausage, crumbled and browned in olive oil
-Bacon, fried and crumbled (as much as desired)
-1 box mushrooms, sliced and sautéed briefly

-Combine all above ingredients, and place in a sprayed baking pan. Top with pats of butter.
-Loosely cover with tin foil, and bake in oven for 30 minutes. Uncover the pan for the last 5 minutes.



Believe it or not, there are actually people at our dinner table who don't eat red meat. I know, right?

Stuffing with Apple, Cranberry, and Walnuts

Use the same base recipe for the stuffing as above:
-16-ounce bag seasoned cornbread stuffing of your choice, moisted with chicken stock instead of water (To avoid overpowering the remaining ingredients, use less stuffing. 10-12 ounces should be enough.)
-Onions and celery, sautéed in butter and olive oil

New ingredients:
-2 Granny Smith apples, cut up
-Dried cranberries, soaked in chicken broth for about an hour
-Walnut halves
-sugar (as much as desired)
-cinnamon (as much as desired)
-Maple syrup (as much as desired)

-Combine all above ingredients, and place in a sprayed baking pan. Top with pats of butter.
-Loosely cover with tin foil, and bake in oven for 30 minutes. Uncover the pan for the last 5 minutes.



From left: Butternut Squash and Cranberry Salad; Baked Artichoke Hearts with Breadcrumbs


Butternut Squash and Cranberry Salad

-Butternut squash, peeled and cut into cubes
-Maple syrup
-Dried cranberries
-1 cup apple cider
-2 tbsp apple cider vinegar
-2 tsp dijon mustard
-2 Shallots, diced
-Olive oil

-Combine butternut squash with olive oil and maple syrup, and toss to coat. Spread out on a baking pan, and bake at 450 degrees for 20-25 minutes.
-Add dried cranberries to the cubed squash, and bake for another 5-10 minutes, or until squash is tender and cranberries plump up.
-In a saucepan, combine apple cider, apple cider vinegar, and mustard. Cook until mixture reduces, add shallots and cook until heated through (not browned). Add 1/2 cup olive oil.
-Pour saucepan mixture over squash and cranberries. Toss to coat, and serve.



Baked Artichokes with Breadcrumbs

-3 cans artichoke hearts, cut into quarters (no marinade)
-Seasoned breadcrumbs
-3 8-ounce boxes fresh mushrooms, sliced
-6 cloves garlic, chopped
-1 cup grated Parmesian cheese
-Olive oil
-Salt & pepper

-Combine all ingredients in a large bowl, with enough olive oil to coat mixture (you want everything to be moist, but not mushy)
-Transfer to a greased baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes, or until crispy.




Cranberry-Apricot Sauce

-2 bags fresh cranberries (12-ounce)
-2/3 cup orange juice (I used Orange-Peach-Mango juice)
-3 cups dried apricot halves, cut into thin strips
-1/2 cup white sugar
-1/2 cup brown sugar
-Orange zest
-Dash of salt


-Combine all of the above ingredients in a saucepan. Cook over medium high heat, stirring constantly. Keep cooking until the cranberries burst and thicken into a jellied consistancy. Cool before serving.


Oh, and of course, dessert.










BUFFALO SPORTS DAILY features The Unemployed Chef as the official BSD Tailgate Blogger!!!


Monday, August 3, 2009

The Unemployed Chef returns!

Sorry I haven't updated this in awhile. Just came back from Seaside, NJ--From one guidoland to another, huh? I'm going to be away for the next few weekends (Pittsburgh, Arizona, Sharon, etc.), so sit tight and try not to get your chonies in a bunch. I'll be back. Try not to miss me *too* much.

Because I'm such a sweet piece of ass, I'll be gracing you this week with a bunch of recipes. You're welcome.

Spending time with the family this weekend, I was finally clued in on a secret ingredient of my grandmother's famous Pasta Fagioli (what us Americanized Italians bastardized as "Pasta Fa-zool"). Pasta & beans, if you really didn't know that (kill yourself). If this doesn't seem that exciting to you, that's because you never tasted my grandmother's pasta fagioli. Each bite tastes like a choir of angels descended onto your tongue to serenade your tastebuds. Heavenly.

So here goes...



Nanny's Famous Pasta Fagioli




......



PSYCHE!

Seriously, do you want my grandmother to haunt you? Why the hell would I give you that recipe?

To increase the disappointment factor, I'm going to give you another SQUASH recipe! Oh when it rains, it pours! Actually, I'm not trying to be a bitch--this squash recipe was pretty dope. If you might remember from my previous squash anecdote, the BF throws a hissy fit every time I make squash...and then begrudgingly admits that he loved the meal. REAL MEN EAT SQUASH. This was supposed to be a hearty meal before his basketball tournament...and instead, he got a fancy-schmancy soup inside a martini cup. Am I a horrible girlfriend? No, he asked if I could make this as an appetizer for company. So, stop frontin'. You know the Unemployed Chef does not disappoint.




Butternut Squash & Red Potato Soup

Makes...um...a lot of servings. Didn't really count, but we each had about 4 glasses each, with leftovers. 10?

Ingredients
-2 pounds butternut squash, mashed (I used frozen mashed winter squash. If you're using the real shit, check out my Butternut Squash Risotto post for an explanation of how to prepare your mash. I'm always an advocate for using the good stuff, but in this recipe, it really doesn't affect the taste at all. Trust.)
-2 tbsp butter
-1 medium white onion, sliced
-2 dashes garlic powder
-4 cups chicken stock (gotta rep' the Organic Free Range Chicken Broth by Pacific Natural Foods)
-3-4 baby red potatoes, peeled & halved
-A *pinch* of cayenne pepper
-A *pinch* of ground nutmeg
-A *pinch* of ground ginger
-Salt & Pepper, to taste
-1 cup heavy cream

Steps
-In a large pot or dutch oven (ha), melt butter over medium-high heat. Add sliced onion to heated butter for about 4-5 minutes, stirring to prevent burning (you don't want these to caramelize). Add garlic powder during the last minute.
-Add potatoes to the butter and onion mixture, and toss to coat. Cover the potatoes with the chicken stock, and bring to a boil. They should be soft enough to mash after 10-15 minutes of boiling. Or you could just check with a fork.


-Add the mashed squash to your pot, and begin mashing your potatoes into the squash. They don't need to be perfectly smooth, unless you really want to work that arm (diesel status).


-If you have a hand blender, good for you. I'm old school and had to transfer my soup to a blender. I was actually able to purée my entire soup in one batch, because I'm awesome. Anyway, I guess the point of this step is basically to purée your soup until smooth. Yeah. And then transfer back to your pot. Simmer over medium-low heat.
-Pinch away. Sprinkle in your "pinches" of cayenne, nutmeg, and ginger. Don't over-do it on the nutmeg. It's STRONG. Add salt and pepper, and taste. I cannot stress this enough. Soup, sauce, whatever. TASTE YOUR FOOD AS YOU COOK IT, DAMMIT. It's a lot better to know your food sucks, and attempt to fix it, before it's out on the serving table. Or you can risk serving a bowl full of ass to your guests. Some people like surprises. Your choice.
-Stir in the heavy cream, and simmer until mixed through (don't boil).


Sip up bitch!
Unfortunately, there's no alcohol in this soup, but I'm sure you could always provide a vodka chaser.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Vodka Sauce? No... just vodka.

Making risotto is no small feat. Especially when you're making risotto while drunk off Bloody Mary's. And your Mary is more Vodka-y than Bloody.

Actually, I'm enduring the gruelingly long process of making risotto because I want an excuse to make butternut squash.

Yes, this = butternut squash.

About a year ago, I became obsessed with squash. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because I never had it growing up (aside from zucchini, but who knew that was squash?), and maybe it's because there's such a variety. And maybe it's because it's SO CHEAP. Anywho, a year ago I became obsessed with squash, and insisted on making every type of squash every night for dinner. Butternut squash, acorn squash, delicata squash, spaghetti squash... and the list goes on. My boyfriend would come home after a long, hard day of work, expecting nothing less than a rare, juicy steak, only to see a roasted, orange concoction strewn upon his plate. "What the hell is this?!" "Hubbard, obviously," I'd reply, pushing a baked orange slice towards him, smothered in honey, brown sugar, and pecans.

I think the last straw was when I returned, ecstatic, from King Kullen with a large Kabocha (Japanese Pumpkin). He responded by grabbing it out of my hands and rolling it down the street (and we live on a hill), and I had to run after my precious Kabocha before it got hit by one of the many Nissan Muranos that speed down our block.

After autumn, there hasn't been much squash variety in any local supermarket or farmer's market, but I have had several packs of frozen butternut squash collecting freezer burn since December. You know me, I'm always an advocate for fresh food over frozen, but I'm also an advocate of not running to the store when there is already food in your house. Combine that with a giant box of Arborio Rice that's been collecting dust in my pantry, and you've got yourself some Butternut Squash Risotto.



Butternut Squash Risotto

Makes 2 (LARGE) servings... Seriously, we couldn't even finish it all. So that probably makes it about 8 servings.



Ingredients

-1 medium butternut squash--or, in my case, 1 12-oz box of frozen precooked winter squash (usually a combination of butternut and acorn squash)
-2 tbsp olive oil
-4 tbsp butter
-6 cups chicken stock (I'll be using the Organic Free Range Chicken Broth from Costco that I mentioned here ...delish!)

-1 medium white or yellow onion (or a few shallots, if you want to be fancy), chopped
-1 vacuum-packed packet of Arborio Rice (about 17.5 oz of dry risotto, or 500 g)

-1/2 to 1 cup grated Parmigiano-Reggiano (depending on your taste)
-Salt & pepper, to taste

Steps

-For those of you using frozen winter squash, you've got it easy. Place the squash in a saucepan with 1/4 cup of water. Bring to a boil over high heat, and reduce heat to a medium low. Cook for about 8 minutes, stirring every 2 minutes to ensure even cooking.
-For those who have an actual butternut squash, you have to do a lil' prep work. First, half the squash lengthwise with a sharp knife (try not to cut off any fingers... I hear the taste of blood doesn't mesh well with risotto). Use a large spoon or ice cream scooper to remove all the seeds and stringy crap in the center of the squash. Brush the squash halves (not the stringy crap) with olive oil, salt, and pepper, and place in a baking pan, cut side up.
Tip: Add about 1/4 cup water to the baking pan, to keep squash from drying out.
-Place your baking pan of orange deliciousness in the oven at 350°F for anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes (you'll want to occasionally check if your fork could pierce the flesh easily...that means it's done). Remove baking pan from oven. Allow to cool until manageable. Cut squash into tiny cubes, place in a bowl, and mash together. Purée mash in a blender to get rid of any remaining lumps, adding a little water if the mixture gets too pasty. Set aside.
-Meanwhile, place your chicken stock or broth in a saucepan, and simmer until hot.
-At the same time (I hope yo' azz could multitask!), you should be heating the olive oil and butter in large pot or dutch oven (hahaha dutch oven... I really can't type this without laughing). Why both oil and butter, you ask? I'm sure you didn't ask, but I find this interesting. Well, since you're so interested, the butter adds the flavor and creamy texture to the risotto. However, butter burns extremely easily, so the olive oil helps give the butter a little bit more staying power. Now, you can sleep easily knowing why both greasing methods are used in this recipe!
-Add your chopped onions to the heated oil/butter, stirring constantly for about 10 minutes, or until your onions are transparent, but not caramelized.

Multitasking at its finest

-Add rice to the onions, stirring to coat the grains with the oil/butter. Stir for about 2 minutes, and then add a ladle full of chicken stock to the rice, with a dash of salt and pepper. Continue stirring (does this count as an arm workout?) until the stock is absorbed. This should take about 5-10 minutes.
-Now's the time to stir in your butternut mash, too. (Little bit at a time... you don't want to overwhelm your risotto with squash. Add a ladle-full at a time, and taste. Taste squash-y enough? Stop.)
-Keep adding a ladle or 2 of stock to the rice, stirring constantly until it's absorbed (and now you understand why I must be drunk to cook risotto).
-Continue this process until your rice is "al dente," and neither dry nor swamped in liquid.
-Turn off the heat, mix in a little Parmigiano, and you've got yourself some freakin' risotto!

PS: This will murder pretty much any diet you're on. But it's so worth it.